Touching Tributes

“Vulnerability sounds like truth and feels like courage. Truth and courage aren't always comfortable, but they're never weakness.” - Brené Brown

I lost my father one year ago yesterday. There have been a lot of tough days since then, but a silver lining has been learning firsthand the beautiful ceremonies the Indian culture has when someone passes, including singing, speeches, and monthly family get togethers for the first year. 

Last night, we held a large extended friends and family zoom (61 participants!), where I said a few words. It was a tribute to my father about his best qualities and how they might serve as life lessons for all of us. (I can see my kids rolling their eyes, moaning “why does everything have to be a life lesson?”.) I spoke about my dad’s ability to accept people as they are, his courage, his ability to see the positive in situations, and his endless reservoir of love. 

Isn’t it curious that we write and say beautiful words about loved ones, after they are gone. But what about those we love WHO ARE STILL HERE? What if we took time to write out a tribute to the person still in front of us? And then say it to them. (Brené Brown, I’m feeling vulnerable...)  

I’ll channel my dad’s courage and share the tribute I wrote this morning for my mom: 

“Mom, you have this beautiful ability to weather the storms of your life. You have taught me to accept life as it is. To find joy in small things every day, to take time to rest when we need it, to take care of our loved ones when they need it, to find a cause and support it with time and money. And your imitation of people’s voices and mannerisms is unexpected and hilarious.” 

Now YOUR TURN. 

· Step 1: Write a short note getting to the core strengths, values, qualities of someone close to you. 

· Step 2: Add a calendar item on your schedule for when you will say it to your person. 

· Step 3: Just do it!

And even if I don’t know your person, I’d love to read your note and share your beautiful words. Email or text me. Know that I debated whether to share such a tender moment from my life in this email, but the vulnerable stories many of you have shared in response to my previous emails pushed me to be vulnerable myself. Brené Brown, I hope you are proud.

Warmly,

Bijal

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