EPIC Conversations

Riaz Patel, who graduated from the same class at Penn with me, has a method to facilitate CONVERSATIONS between “people who start out believing they are diametrically opposed.” Riaz bills himself as a “triple minority”because he’s a Muslim, an immigrant, and gay. His model has helped him and many others have deep conversations with people of all backgrounds, faiths, and beliefs.

The model is called EPIC. While he focuses on using it for difficult conversations, I think we can use it for all types of conversations. I’m planning on trying it out on my family members tonight! I hope you will try it as well. Drop me a line and let me know how it goes and what tweaks you made to personalize it.

EPIC:

• Equalization: figure out what you both have in common.

• Personification: understand the other person’s story, where they are coming from.

• Information Gathering: ask questions about their personal experiences that have shaped them. Try steer the conversation away from outside sources such as CNN or books and focus on the other person.

• Collaboration: if there is some connection and trust, you can move to this last phase where you look for ways to help solve a shared problem.