Reflecting On Implicit Bias
We suffer because we forget our belonging to one another.” – Mother Theresa
This week’s theme has been REFLECTION, and I find myself drawn to reflecting on the implicit bias that I’m saddened is still prevalent in our society today. Growing up, even in New York, I felt this bias daily if not hourly ANY TIME I was out of my home. I could share a lifetime of memories and stories starting when I was five all the way up to last week. From the educational system to the workplace, it was like the low hum of an air-conditioning unit in the background – always present when you notice it. My history is one of the reasons I am so passionate about helping women and people of color compensate for this cultural bias in the work that I do.
This isn’t their problem. This isn’t my problem. This is your problem because it’s everyone’s problem.
This is the time to come together, to dialogue, to forge a path forward. That path becomes more intentional and I hope brighter with reflection, versus impulsive reactivity.
Chaos is contagious, but calm is contagious too. How can you be the best version of yourself? And help others in your world?
Which leads me to a practical framework I hope will inspire you, and that I’ve come to rely on for challenging situations:
AWARENESS => FOCUS => REFLECTION
Change starts with AWARENESS: Deep reflection will bring awareness to your own biases, your values, why you feel the way you do, your judgements towards yourself and others. And if you think you are not biased, let me challenge you by asking you to take a racial bias assessment. As a woman of color, I was saddened by my score. But the org psychologist side of me knows that our habits, behaviors and biases form deeply grooved paths in our brains. Changing these pathways takes time, awareness, vigilance, and courage to face and make hard decisions every day. BUT IT STARTS WITH AWARENESS.
Then comes FOCUS: focused effort, focused energy towards changing the grooves that have formed in your brain with your thinking, beliefs, and habits. And as a coach, I’m always going to push you to choose COURAGE. Ask the tough questions, speak out when you see even a small racial bias in your world. Make those hard choices in everyday life to move the needle in the direction you choose. Even if your bias is not 100% removed, you can still focus and decide to make the right decision to compensate for your bias.
Last step is REFLECTION: Check in with yourself. How are your efforts going? What have you discovered about yourself and others? What adjustments do you need to make to fine-tune your efforts? My hope is that you feel encouraged by your actions and efforts and double down upon reflection.
In the spirit of Mother Theresa’s quote above, here is what I commit to you:
I COMMIT TO: more 1:1 conversations with people who are different than me. To understand their pain, their stories, their perspectives.
I COMMIT TO: being courageous and speaking up with love and compassion when either I feel racial bias or see it happening to others.
I COMMIT TO: not shying away from difficult conversations when people ask me my opinion, even if I worry about them judging me, my experiences, and my opinions (and I’m never short on opinions!)
I COMMIT TO: speaking with my children openly about all types of bias, understanding their perspective, and helping them see other perspectives.
I would love to hear what you commit to.
I may not have gotten all the words right, but I hope you will give me grace and see my intention in writing about this.
If I can assist you on your own path, please schedule time with me here:https://calendly.com/bijalchoksi/alliance